5 good things

1. red lipstick
2. waking up sans sinus issues
3. chai tea
4. bt time
5. comp'ed tickets.

5 things i love

1. sleeping
2. chapstick
3. phone calls from my family
4. unexpected plans happening when i had no plans
5. invitations

france

today i spoke french with a coworker. granted, he doesn't speak french, and i no longer speak it well. we tried for a few minutes though, nonetheless.

france me manques. les autres? vous la manquez?

5 things i love about france:
1. le jurancon sec white wine
2. paris, lyon, normandy and how small town feel they all are
3. roundabouts
4. high speed rail

5. surrounded by the language

from my time in paris - - -

mad men.

"I love red heads, their mouths are like a drop of strawberry jam in a sea of milk."Roger Sterling, Mad Men

5 things. june inspired.

1. multiple improv shows
2. ice cream all the time
3. how i met your mother (not really june inspired, still good though)
4. flowers
5. bike rides

5 things

1. waking up just before my alarm sounds
2. unapologetic obsession with the kardashians
3. clean anything
4. red grapes
5. unnecessarily almost completely unbuttoned shirts on tim lyons

life jackets. who's yours?

first aid kit. sometimes you just need one.

http://youtu.be/DDG8xqz7BIk

So you ask for my opinion

Well what is there to say
To be honest and just foolish
Won’t make you wanna stay
You’ve got to go on and get moving
I can’t do that for you
Got so many plans and so much you want to do

Love it tough, time is rough

Love is tough, time is rough
Whoaaaa on me

Well I see you’ve got your bible
Your delusion imagery
Well I don’t need your eternity
Or your meaning to feel free
I just live because I love to
And that’s enough you see
So don’t come preach about morality
That’s just human sense to me

Love is tough, time is rough
Love is tough, time is rough
Whoaaaa on me
On me

And it’s one life and it’s this life
And it’s beautiful
And it’s beautiful

Love is tough, time is rough
Whoaaaa on me

nicky kidman

Sometimes at work, I make up stories about Nicole Kidman.

i just spent 25 minutes on this gem.

THIS JUST IN:

NICOLE KIDMAN ACCEPTS STARRING ROLE AS "GOAT" IN A NEW PRODUCTION OF THE FAMED GOODMAN THEATRE FAUX PAS, YET SOMEHOW CLASSIC TALE:

"THE GOAT"

THE STORY FOLLOWS THE STORY OF ONE MAN WHO FALLS IN LOVE WITH HIS GOAT, AND THE REST IS HISTORY. RUMORS RUSTLE THAT CHARLIE SHEEN WILL CO-STAR AS "THE MAN." SHEEN WAS NOT ASKED TO COMMENT.

5 things

1. tea
2. finding out my anxiety was over nothing
3. gelatto
4. hazelnut lattes
5. slippers

paradox.

So, I'm thinking about that quote from John Lennon. You know the one. "Life is what happens while you're busy making other plans." And, I've got to throw this stick in the mud out there, but let's be honest, he couldn't possibly have been the first person to coin this. There's no way that he just stumbled upon a profound reality. Every time has a first time, if life is indeed linear, but John Lennon, really? Humanity has been around for a while now, and I'd say this is a truth that's always been as such. Perhaps he got the verbage just right though before anyone else?

In any case, lately the notion of why we exist has been on my plate. Yes, I realize, it's a no big deal existential crisis. NBDEC. Thanks a bunch, Holy Week. (It's Holy Week right now, for those of you that aren't burdened with religion — the week leading up to the inevitable crucifixion of Jesus Christ.)

Perhaps it's the fact that I'm an awful Catholic, by way probably an awful person, because I just don't care. It's not that I don't care about people or things or getting what I want, I do, I just don't know why I should. I just know that I do.

The thing is, when I think about these things, there's never a point where I just say, "Oh, alright." The lights turn on and everything is dandy. When I think about these things I find myself alone, feeling broken, and not knowing where to go from here. Can you tell me, why are we here?

Chalk it up to whatever you want, but at this point it all seems meaningless, yet full of so much weight. I think paradox should have been the first word given definition.

Friday Night Lights

i had this in my draft box for a long while now. i've been doing some spring cleaning, so i figured that the internet and its endless spots to tuck little bits of me was a good place to start digging out, dusting off and maybe deleting.

but this post title made me laugh, because it makes me think of lip quivering. that's mostly thanks to stephanie cook, coach of the latest batch of incubator teams at the playground.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q5Z5BzNAh6Y

i hope its hilarity is not lost upon you.

5 things

1. inaugural shows at the playground
2. biking in warm rain
3. earring holders
4. day drinking wine
5. the into the wild soundtrack compliments of eddie vedder
6. $9 prescriptions at target
7. saying, "am i right?" like a jackass whenever i can
8. knowing spring is just around the corner
9. my new ride
10. clean apartments

five things

1. music in emails. every monday. without fail.
2. honey in my tea
3. my bomber jacket
4. talking to colleen
5. talking to my mom
6. hanging with the pups
7. traveling
8. burritos
9. instant sleep
10. quality time
11. live performance

bonne nuit.

POetry.

One of the things I honestly really love is when poems are read out loud. If it's me whose doing the reading or otherwise, I'm cool. During my third year of high school I finally decided to take performing more seriously. I added Forensics (aka Speech Team) to my repertoire of activities and found myself filling the PO spot (Poetic Oration). It was then that I loved TS Eliot. It was then that I loved the cadence of language. It was then that I realized my passion for performing.

And every time I read Eliot's poems, and especially when I reread The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock, I am turned. Perhaps it's because it was my first Eliot poem, but regardless of any of that, this poem speaks to my very core. I've discussed it at length many times and have even written about it once or twice in this blog and others. This line, "And time yet for a hundred indecisions, and for a hundred vision and revisions" causes my being to pulsate.

And would it have been worth it, after all,
After the cups, the marmalade, the tea,
Among the porcelain, among some talk of you and me,
Would it have been worth while,	90
To have bitten off the matter with a smile,
To have squeezed the universe into a ball
To roll it toward some overwhelming question,
To say: “I am Lazarus, come from the dead,
Come back to tell you all, I shall tell you all”—	95
If one, settling a pillow by her head,
Should say: “That is not what I meant at all.
That is not it, at all.”

Five

Things. I. Love.

1. bicycle rides when it's 65 and sunny
2. gelato
3. unexpected hangouts
4. following through
5. belonging

i forgot how much i love writing these short lists. today i went through some old emails from a good friend of mine, and finally downloaded all the music i've been waiting to listen to from said emails. how much do i love paul asjes' weekly monday music emails? hint, it'll be in my next five things.

Wish You Were Here.

I've never been big into classic rock. I can safely say that I refrain from listening to it almost always. But, tonight, on my drive home from rehearsal I flipped on the ole FM, and tuned into 93.1 XRT, and Pink Floyd's "Wish You Were Here" was playing. I always associated bands like Pink Floyd, The Grateful Dead, and Led Zeppelin with a certain sort of person. The kids in high school who listened to those bands (and a slew of others, ranging from MOE to Dave Matthews Band) were all exactly the same — wannabees in tie-dye t-shirts, frayed jeans or baggy khakis, and the desire to live out That 70s Show in 2000. I imagined their fathers, stuck in jobs they disliked — but too good to leave because of the money and the need to support a family on the North Shore — having a pivotal moment of man-to-man-ness where father bends down on one knee with his son beside him, blows dust off a record, and then proceeds to play it, trying to gain some semblance of the man he hoped he'd be.

I typecast this crowd like nobodies business. I'm guessing now my hippy-slacker schoolmates all work in insurance or banking, and of course do karaoke every now and again, always picking from the same 5 songs, which inevitably include Bruce Springsteen's "Glory Days."

For now though, I'll revel in the fact that this song is actually quite good. It's brutal honesty made me feel sad and human.



"Wish You Were Here"
So, so you think you can tell
Heaven from Hell,
Blue skys from pain.
Can you tell a green field
From a cold steel rail?
A smile from a veil?
Do you think you can tell?

And did they get you to trade
Your heros for ghosts?
Hot ashes for trees?
Hot air for a cool breeze?
Cold comfort for change?
And did you exchange
A walk on part in the war
For a lead role in a cage?

How I wish, how I wish you were here.
We're just two lost souls
Swimming in a fish bowl,
Year after year,
Running over the same old ground.
What have we found?
The same old fears.
Wish you were here